Disclaimer: Not my work. I found it so funy I couldnt resist sharing.


US: Ok, putting together a group for an Iraq raid... who's in?

UK: Of course I'm in.

Turkey: Only if someone makes me new armor. Last Iraq raid I lost money on.

US: *sigh* Ok, I can't make your cultural armor, but I'll help pay for it. How much you need?

Turkey: 100k plat.

US: ***?! Are you smithing the armor out of platinum, ya tard? No frikking way. 30k plat, and that's all I'm offering.

Turkey: Sweet. Ok, I'm in.

Spain: I frikking hate Iraq. They were spawn campin us for frikking EVER, man -- long time ago, but we're still pissed off about it. Meet you at Turkish zone line.

US: Cool, thx.

Italy: Me 2.

Chile: I'm in.

US: Ok, so far, got US, UK, Turks, Spain, Italy, Chile.

Bulgaria: Umm, got room for some lowbies? Thought maybe we could leech some raid xp ...

US: Yeah, sure. Why not. Just don't attack anything. Make sure to set up a /assist US hotkey, ok?

France: Hey all, what's up?

US: Putting together a raid, hitting Iraq.

France: No frikking way, dood. Look, I'm part of Alliance leadership, and I say no way do we go in there. I'm using Alliance veto.

US: ***? Alliance Veto?

France: Yeah, it's in the guild charter. Me, Germany, US, Russia, and China can all cancel any guild raid event.

Bulgaria: Hey, me and the other Eastern Europeans wanna go ...

France: ****, n00b. Your guild got no say in this.

Bulgaria: ,,!,,

Germany: I don't really want to go either.

US: ...

France: Yeah, we veto. No guildies go to Iraq.

US: What about you, Russia.

Russia: Well, if everyone else goes, it's ok, but if France and Germany say no, then that's cool.

US: Jeebus. Dood, show some balls. You used to love going on raids.

Russia: Yeah, but that Afghanistan raid a while back was a disaster. Total group wipe-out.

US: Yeah, but you were in different alliance, man. This is different. Besides, we pwn3d last time we went on Iraq raid.

France: Doesn't matter. I say no.

Spain: .tell US doesn't matter if France doesn't go anyway, he just feigns death anytime he sees combat. He's a bu77munch. Lives next door to me.

Spain: Oops. MT.

France: Oh yeah? Well you skipped that WWII raid completely.

Spain: Only cuz I'd just come back from dueling, was too tired to raid. Besides, you died in first wave, spent the rest of the raid licking dirt and whining.

France: ..!..

US: Guys, c'mon. I'm trying to put this thing together, here... look, I don't care what France says. I'm going, and anyone who wants to come with me can. China, you in?

China: *shrug* Don't feel like it.

US: Ok...


You tell North Korea: No thanks, guy. Trying to get a raid going.

North Korea tells you: "Ur just scaerd of teh pwnage"

You tell North Korea: Riiiigh. ****, okay? I'm busy.

North Korea taunts you.

/ignore North Korea.

US: How come you're not coming, Germany?

Germany: I'm just not into the violence anymore.

You tell Germany: Bullsh1t, you're just waiting for us to go into Iraq so you can gank France again.

Germany tells you: Ooops. *blush* busted!!

You tell Germany: Dude, why bother? He's green to you.

Germany tells you: It's just satisfying, I guess. It shuts him up for a while, anyway.

France: I'm telling you, if anyone goes, then it'll break the Alliance.

Spain tells you: Whoop-de-sh1t, this Alliance sucks. Let's go anyways.

US: France, *** is ur problem?

France: I want to send scouts in first. Let them see if any named are up.

US: Ok, how long it gonna take them?

France: Couple weeks, maybe. Months, possibly.

US: MONTHS? ***???! Dude, I don't want to wait that long. I'll give your scouts a week, at most. We'll reschedule then.

France: I may veto anyway.

US: Yeah, whatever.

You tell Spain: Yeah, may have to. He's a dipsh1t.

Bulgaria tells you: If you go, let me know. Me and my lowbie buddies are in.

You tell Bulgaria: Cool, thx. Are you someone's alt?

Bulgaria tells you: Some of us were Russia's buff toons, but we're soloing now.

US: Ok, meet again next week. We'll take things from there.

FEW WEEKS LATER:

Bush shout "Guild United States of America holding a raid on Iraq if you are 50+ and wish to help send a tell"
Turkey shouts "Hey Bush Wazzup!!! Why is USoA going to raid that again.....kind of a been there done that for you isnt it?
Bush shouts "we found out that that Al Queda Guild was twinked by Iraq. That is how they pull off that 9/11 Raid on us"
Turkey tells you "whoa no way!! ok we are with you. Will get guildies moving right away"
TonyBlair tells you "Would love to go raiding with you bro, but guildmates think it is a mistake. trying to talk them into it."
You tell TonyBlair "D00D!!! ***!! USoA totally saved your guilds asses on that WWII raid. you guys were getting Owned.
TonyBlair tells you :I know Bro, I will talk them into it. You'll see.
China shouts "Hey Bush what about RNK!! hehehe they gonna take you guys apart if you keep looking at IRAQ.
Bush shouts "???"
Bush shouts "RNK??? Never heard of them. they new guild?"
China shouts "Republic of North Korea"
Bush shouts "LOL ok whatever. they are newbie guild. tell them good luck"
China shouts "Man you guys think you are so Uber. We are a bigger guild then you....that makes use stronger then you. we are UBER!"
Turkey shouts "LOL"
TonyBlair shouts "LOL"
Italy shouts "LOL"
Bush shouts "You might have more members in China but they are lowbies with crap gear dude. you guys are not UBER!!!"
Russia shouts "LOL"
Germany shouts "LOL"
Japan shouts "ROFLMAO OMG YOU BEEN DISSED BAD n00b. USoA put the smak down on you BIZATCH"
Saddam shouts "LOL"
China shouts "Shut your hole Japan! or we will raid you again!"
Bush shouts "!?!?!?!!"
Bush shouts "SADDAM SPAWNED"
Turkey shouts "Pulling!!!"
Bush shouts "get ready everyone"
Turkey shouts "inc target"
Turkey shouts "inc A_Desert_Madman"
TonyBlair shouts "Wrong Mob....Saddam is Named Madman"
You begin to cast a spell
A_Desert_Madman is Nuked for 10000 Non-Melee Damage
A_Desert_Madman Dies
You have slain A_Desert_Madman
Saddam shouts "LOLOL USoA is SuX0r!!!
/who all Saddam
There are no players in everquest that have that name.
Bush shouts "BAH!! He zoned"
Saddam tells you "I heard what you are going to do and I am petitioning about it right now!"
Italy Shouts "What a Biiiiaaaaatch"
You tell Saddam "Like that is going to stop us! Get your guild ready big man we are comming!!"
Saddam tells you " AFK: away from keyboard---Reporting your sorry ass Guild!!"
Italy shouts "Lets Go Stick a Boot in his A$$!"
Bush shouts "Thats it.....USoA is going in now. anyone with us zone now"
Turkey shouts "Im going"
Chile shouts "me too"
Italy shouts "me"
TonyBlair shouts "WOOT my guild is in"
TonyBlair tells you "I told you I could talk them into it"
Russia shouts "Decided not to go on this one guys"
Chile shouts "So, Your guild sux anyway. you guys camped that Afganistan spawn for 10 years and then gor wiped!!"
Russia shout "HEY, That was before the Y2K expansion came out. We got way better gear now!"
Bush shouts "zone now if you are comming"
LOADING, PLEASE WAIT....
You Have Entered Bagdad
There are 1,467,397 players in this zone
Bush shouts " UHG!!! LAAAAAAG"
Turkey points at Saddam, Yeah you!!
Turkey says "There he is!!"
((A UN customer service representative appears))
UNCSR says "This Zone is currently Non-PvP. Please Take all hostilities elsewhere."
Bush says "Saddam MADE himself PvP......not our fault he turned in his book of discord!! he is fair game"
UNCSR begins to cast a spell
UNCSR casts UN Resolution
Saddam feels Resolute
UNCSR says "Saddam's PvP tag is temporarily Suspended While we conduct an investigation into the matter"
UNCSR begins to cast a spell
Saddam says "SWEET"
UNCSR fades from view
((Saddam Begins randomly removing and equipping weapons))
Saddam looks at you apprehensively, You would most likely win this fight
Saddam is too far away to inspect
Saddam looks at you apprehensively, You would most likely win this fight
Saddam is too far away to inspect
Saddam looks at you apprehensively, You would most likely win this fight
Saddam is too far away to inspect
Bush says "Let us inspect you!!!"
Saddam says "in a minute!!! I am not ready yet!!
((Saddam finishes changing out weapons))
Saddam says "OK now you can inspect me"
Saddam Smiles
Saddam smiles at you kindly, You would most likely win this fight
You are inspecting Saddam
((Standard Newbie Weapons))
Bush says "HEY *** where are all you uber weapons!?!?!"
Saddam says "I dont have any Uber weapons"
Bush says "What a load of crap. you are lying"
France says "maybe he doesnt have any like he says. just leave him alone and let the UNCSR do that investigation
/Ignore France
NorthKorea tells you "You Be77er forg3t about IRAQ. What you gonna do now!!! I got TWINKED PHAT. d00d I will qwnage you!!!"
/Ignore NorthKorea
Saddam Smiles at his UN Reso buff
Saddam says "What you gonna do now Bush.....huh huh......that is what I thought. LOL"
Bush smiles
Bush begins to cast a spell
Bush casts Cancel Magic
Saddam feels a bit dispelled
Bush smiles
Turkey smiles
Italy smiles
Chile smiles
TonyBlair smiles
Bush begins to cast a spell
Saddam shouts "UH OH!!! TRAIN TO ZONE TRAIN TO ZONE



I particularly like this part:

North Korea has challenged you to a duel! Type /duel accept to accept or /duel decline to decline the challenge.

US: /duel decline

North Korea tells you: "Dood u r teh suq. I will r0xxorz u"

Haha

ok, that was great.

Welcome to 4 months ago. =p

Hey zehn, my yellow title is bigger then yours :p

France: Yeah, it's in the guild charter. Me, Germany, US, Russia, and China can all cancel any guild raid event.

That would be Great Britan not Germany.

america lacking some crowdcontrol latley ...

Piss off bitch.

wtf is hartmut talking about?

nothing important, just this

lunaville.org/warcasualties/Summary.aspx (http://lunaville.org/warcasualties/Summary.aspx)

...so what's your point Harmut?

I think everyone on this board is pretty aware of the mounting casualties in Iraq.

"nothing important"

Kinda sums up all your posts.

You may be aware of the mounting casualties, but are you aware of the dipshit the US prez and co. threw out to get the US involved in this needless war?

I like how that wasn't conveyed in the 'Iraq--EQ style'

War on terror? Whatever.

It's absolutely amazing how Jon Stewart is the best and most honest source of news y'all 'Mericans have going right now, and he's a comedian.

/em puts on flame suit.

Yea better zip that flame suit up tight you bitch.

Amazing how a political joke thread brings the cockroaches right back out from the dumpster.

Please just shut your filthy cock holster, the whole "thiS waR R baD!1" discussion is getting real old.

Perfect--if you point out the flaws, you get trashed!

You're tripe gets older

Commentary supporting your crap is apperciated. Commentary not is lambasted--

Beautiful support of the 1st, Marz...

I think I pointed out the Jon Stewart--political humour at its best.

I actually appreciated the EQ post--thought it was funny. Just pointing out the inherent flaws.

It's absolutely amazing how Jon Stewart is the best and most honest source of news y'all 'Mericans have going right now, and he's a comedian.

That's pointing out that Jon Stewart is a good source of political humor?

Sounds more like another Euro sucker punch (tm) at the Americans.

Bottom line, until Hartmut and opened your yaps, it WAS a joke thread.

Was Zark on-topic? How 'bout some other posts before mine? And yet your bitchfest was originally directed at me, and it had nothing to do with taking it off-topic.

And as if taking a thread off-topic has never happened here before.

So what's your point, Marz?

"Euro sucker punch"? Again with the "if you're not with us, you're against us"?

It still is a joke thread--started off pretty funny, then few things got said that I thought needed slight correction, then you jump in with your yip.

I think it's still rather humourous.

Utopia added a slight correction.

You added the typical Ytrok-ish bullshit.

How does Euro sucker punch equate to "if you're not with us, you're against us"?

You are taking a statement I made up about the constant barrage of "lets piss off the Americans" posts, and justifying it by linking it head on, to the President's quote.

By the way, my original bitch was with Hartmut. I don't know what the fuck brought you out of the wood work, but FYI most of us are sick of the "America R teh SuX0rZ" drivel.

Just pointing out the inherent flaws.What you meant to say was "I have nothing better to do with my time than make posts that were supposed to be funny suck". It's about the same as me posting this response. I could be sleeping but Nooo....

Perfect--if you point out the flaws, you get trashed!

But you completely failed to do anything but call names and throw out opinion. What flaws did you point out there, Sherlock?

I think those that were trashing you, did so because your "signal to noise" ratio is way off the meter, not for having an opinion and "pointing out flaws". Dig?

Got it, Faust.

Ass out of Texas
A Chinese doctor said, "Medicine in my country is so advanced, we can take a kidney out of one person, put it in another and have him looking for work in six weeks."
A German doctor said "That's nothing! In Germany, we can take a lung out of one person, put it in another and have him looking for work in four weeks."
A Russian doctor said, "In my country, medicine is so advanced, we can take half a heart from one person, put it in another and have them both looking for work in two weeks."
The American doctor, not to be outdone, said "Hah!...We can take an ass out of Texas, put him in the White House, and half the country will be looking for work the next day!"

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http://www.geocities.com/gwbblows/Pro_War_Protest.psd.gif
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funnypicsgeorgebush.tripod.com/ (http://funnypicsgeorgebush.tripod.com/)
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http://www.thebrowntimes.com/bushstupid.jpg
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http://www.thebrowntimes.com/america_invasion_check_list.jpg
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http://www.thebrowntimes.com/bushandsaddam.jpg

But a few of many... :)

1 - Attempt at humor to detract attention from lack of facts.

2- Doctored

3- Doctored (similar one doctored for President Clinton back in the day.)

4- You're not paying attention

5- Funny as hell

6- You're still not paying attention

Here's a consolation prize, a home edition of Ay Ro NAG...

Extremely funny post. ROTFLMAO!
If you can't find any humor in this I think you need to replace your funny bone.
The GWB pictures are funny too. lates

http://www.speechperfect.com/Saddam/ricinkrispies.jpg
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http://www.speechperfect.com/Saddam/bush_badsaddam.jpg
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http://www.speechperfect.com/Saddam/iraq_candyfactory.jpg

check out www.lifeisajoke.com (http://www.lifeisajoke.com)

4- You're not paying attention

Umm,perhaps you`d care to explain that statement.
Btw just because people don`t share you`re views it doesn`t mean they are wrong.

1- Please see other, quasi-related thread (Signal to noise ratio) for answer as to why I might think you are not paying attention.

2- Differing opinions certainly do not create a condition of right vs. wrong. I fail to see how this is related to my belief that you are not paying attention.

This is seriously the first time I've seen someone make the mistake of using 'you're' when he obviously means your - at least that many times.

If you're (you are!) not certain, just use your (belong to you), at least that way you do not look like you're (you are!) trying so hard to make your (belonging to you) posts correct -- and failing